It is not enough to lean against the Calf Raise machine. No. You must step into it, submit to the yoke, strain like an ox busting sod under a Nebraska sun.
I will show you how, if you simply stand aside.
My apologies if I was unkind in describing your legs. Perhaps you spent the last six months in leg casts from an accident not entirely of your own authoring. Or maybe your frat bros locked you in a veal crate and forgot to unhaze you before winter break.
Tick tock, Warm Springs. In my mind, I’m already on the third draft of this post.